Relationships are tough. Period. They take a lot of work, commitment, and dedication. And that’s just an average relationship. When you throw anxiety and depression into the mix, maintaining a healthy relationship can be one of the hardest things to do, but it is possible.
Over the past couple of years, I have learned a lot about how to have healthy relationships through videos, articles, therapy, and advice here and there. I’m pretty open to learning all that I possibly can, because honestly, I’ve never truly had a healthy relationship, and that is one of my biggest goals.
My anxiety brings doubt, fear, jealousy, paranoia, trust issues, neediness, and more into the relationship. I’m difficult as hell, and I can own up to that. All of the qualities you shouldn’t bring to a relationship, I have had at one point or another. Some of these things, I’ve managed to overcome, but there are others that I’m still working on.
Through every TED talk, every podcast, every ebook, every article, every YoutTube video, every discussion with a friend, and every therapy session, there is always one common theme, regardless of the issue at hand; self-love.
At this point, if I could pinpoint the number one most important trait you must have to have a healthy relationship, it would be to love yourself first. Of course, there are multiple traits like loyalty, trust, faithfulness, respect, and independence to name a few, but all of those stem from self-love, confidence, and self-esteem.
I first learned this lesson 5 and a half months ago on New Year’s Eve, and ever since then, it seems to be a reoccurring topic in the world of relationships. It all seems to come back to this one source; this one gold nugget of wisdom.
Practicing self-love in a relationship won’t cure your anxiety or make your depression magically disappear. It won’t give you the “perfect” relationship or fix all of your problems. But with that being said, it can make things easier. It can ease your anxiety, it can make you feel more relaxed and content, and it can help make your relationship a happier place.
Learning to practice self-love will allow you to see your worth and value and boost your self-esteem. By taking that first step, you’ll be able to exude confidence, have more faith in your partner, trust more, be less jealous, irrational, and paranoid. You’ll be able to become more independent, less needy towards your partner, and overall, a happier person to be with!
The old advice is true… you must love yourself before you can love another person.
Make sure to click on the links throughout my post for previously written articles regarding some of the specifics I discussed! Also, I’m getting ready to start work on an entire ebook that will have everything I’ve learned over the past couple of years, plus what’s worked for me all wrapped up into a neat little package!