This is gonna be a short one because frankly, life is feeling really weird and I haven’t been taking a ton of photos. But, I’ll get to some of that throughout the recap!
I had Monday off of work so I spent the morning at the library again.
This time I worked in the teen section. It’s a separate wing of the library with booths, lots of sunlight, and peace. I was the only person there the entire time. I loved the seclusion.
After working for a few hours, I spent the rest of the day at home in a cluster of hot mess in my bedroom. I cleaned out the entire closet and threw out three garbage bags worth of stuff, and I haven’t even touched the clothes yet.
I found my first book when I was going through my boxes. I can’t wait to get a new cover!
On Tuesday morning, I worked and then ended up spending the majority of the day with Will. It was completely unplanned. We grabbed lunch, and then relaxed at my house and watched Netflix.
And yes, those are my sunglasses.
I had another 4 AM shift at work (they’re killing me!) on Wednesday. I was really anxious all morning. I’m finding that those mornings while I work and I’m alone with my thoughts I get the most anxious.
I suffer from bad morning anxiety as it is, but when I have the opportunity to get that wrapped up in my own mind, it’s just so much worse.
But, when I got home, I made my lemon water, wrote my to-do list, lit my Christmas Cookie candle and got to work on catching up on my projects.
Yesterday was another anxiety-filled day, and it’s not something I want to share the details about, but I managed.
Today, I should be out of my mind with anxiety. I really shouldn’t be doing well today, considering something I’m dealing with on top of the anxiety I deal with on a regular basis, but for once, I am completely okay.
I’m physically exhausted and would love to crawl into bed and sleep for the next three days, but mentally I don’t feel completely overwhelmed, and I’m really proud of that.
This morning at work when I was feeling anxious, I had a nice long talk with God. Literally. I guess talking to Him is considered prayer, but I like to think of it more as just a conversation with a friend. I just talked about everything I’m feeling and asked for a lot of help in finding my strength to deal with these things. I know that’s what did it.
Shortly after that talk, (while in the bathroom, of course), I checked my email and had an income report with my first earned money from blogging. That was really the boost that I needed at that moment. The number was literally so teeny tiny, but that wasn’t the point; just seeing that I actually hit that goal was a huge motivator.
I’ve been working so hard on my blog, and one of my goals is to work from home making a full-time income blogging and writing. That would be a dream. I would absolutely love to be able to pay my bills, have more financial freedom and put all of my time into doing what I love and helping others cope along the way.
Being able to focus on me and the things that make me feel happy and fulfilled today really helped ease my anxiety, as well. It’s certainly not gone; I can still feel it in the pit of my stomach, but keeping busy and focusing on bettering myself is the way to go!
Have a great weekend!